to begin with... i take back all of my doubts about the pumpkin spice latte being better than the eggnog latte correction: should be doubts about the eggnog latte being better than pumpkin spice...oops. i had one this morning (eggnog) and i readily admit that i was wrong. the eggnog latte is amazing! ...well, as amazing as a beverage could be. that is all. and now... i know i keep saying that i'm stopping (stopping what, you may not know), but i can't get it out of my mind that i have once again fucked myself over. thursday i was doubting and annoyed. friday i was surprised and happy with how things went (mostly the comfort level reached). saturday i was okay and still feeling much like friday. and then sunday rolled around...which started the downfall of feeling okay about things, but was still somewhat alright. by monday, thursdays doubting had been replaced by a new doubting (one that sucks more and has 'morgan's fault' written all over it)... which is where i'm at right now. the funny thing about this whole situation is that NEVER in my life have i ever felt like this before... like, i have so much control over how things go and how people feel (when i really know that i don't), and i know that it really couldn't be my fault but it still feels like it because i can't just ask! that's why it bothers me so much because i'm not like this with anything else... i'm always the one who sits there saying, "what happens will happen. just let it be." and i'm usually the first one to ask or tell stuff, everything gets out in the open and if i could do that i wouldn't even be where i'm at right now! FRICK!