"the world just keeps you at an arms length"
do you know that it is really hard to be myself sometimes. i feel like even when i'm trying to be myself i'm still being somebody else. but sometimes it's really fun to be somebody else...it's just not so good all the time. last night i had so much stuff to write about but now i cant seem to remember any of it. hmm....what does that tell you? i guess i just had a better flow yesterday. going from the thought at the beginning of this entry, i find that sometimes i try to be funny or smart or whatever when i dont really feel like i'm funny or smart at the time and that's all i mean by not being myself, because it's not that i'm being fake or trying to act like somebody or something i'm not...i'm just not me. i really dont know if this even makes any sense at all but i'm going to pretend that it does. the best is when i'm not trying to be funny and then i say something that makes everybody burst out laughing or i'll just make a comment that leaves everybody thinking. that's the greatest because i dont even have to try and it just happens, i love it.